Dear Lady. Ann:
My boyfriend and I have had a very rocky relationship. We started dating when we were very young and we have broken up a few times. The last time we broke up, I told him that I wouldn’t take him back if he doesn’t change. He is very insecure and had cheated on me a few times. Every time he cheated, I would find out it was because I was too busy with my life that I stopped feeding his ego.
He proved to have changed and we started dating again. I must admit that he has been consistent and more selfless since we got back together. My problem now is he has become too possessive. I don’t belong to anyone and I don’t think I need anyone’s permission to do or be me (and I’m not going to change even if I’m his wife). But now he wants to control where I go and who I go with. When I attend events without him, he is constantly asking who would be there and when I will be back. I have told him several times that I hate being controlled and he says he knows he has hurt me so much in the past that he suspects I would walk away from him. He has hurt me a lot, but I will only walk away if he continues like this.
He hardly goes out with his friends because the kind of friends he has are drunks and losers. I have advised him to make new friends but he says he is too shy to do so. Well I can’t help him make friends and I don’t intend to stop hanging out with my friends because of how he feels. I know that’s what he would prefer but I can’t sacrifice that part of my life. I try to hang out with him and give him that attention, but I’m a people’s person. How can I maintain my lifestyle while still maintaining my relationship with my boyfriend? I really do love him, I just don’t want to give up my life for him.
-Choked Girlfriend
#DLATribe, how can she live her life and still maintain a healthy relationship??