Dear Lady. Ann:
My name is Theresia. I am from Germany. My Englisch is not the best, so I would like to continue in German. I hope that is ok for you.
Please NOTE that we took the liberty to translate this letter to English on her behalf!
My name is Theresia and I am 36 years old. I have been dating my boyfriend for 17 years and we have known each other for 18 years. We have had some good years, but also some not so good years. I have not been able to have sex with him now for years. We only have sex once a year, and that’s not always the case. It got to a point where I stopped opening up myself.
Three years ago, my boyfriend had an affair that lasted for two years. We separated afterwards and got back together again. I still feel hurt from that experience. Although I have forgiven him, things are still a little bit strange between us. Since then, we have not had sex. I want kids and I would love to be married, but how can we have kids when I can’t even open up myself? I actually know that this isn’t working anymore and that God has something else for me but I can’t seem to separate from him. I love him, but I know this is not supposed to be. I’m afraid of what’s to come and that my boyfriend would make things more difficult.
We built a house together and he has to pay me a lot of money back. There is so much on my mind, I feel so frustrated. I am 36 years and have spent so many years with one man, albeit I have not progressed in all this time. I would really love to have a family. My boyfriend says he wants a family too, but we are not moving forward. He doesn’t speak to me anymore, and he plans the future. I also pray for him. I am a Believer but most times, I am not a good Believer. I’m often like a Thomas. I am stubborn and I don’t have any trust. I pray, but my prayers are weak. What do I do?