Dear Lady. Ann:
So, I met this guy two years ago and we really connected. He had just come out of a toxic relationship, which he said he never wanted to return back to. He told me a lot about his ex and I understood why he had to break it off. She had cheated on him with her ex a few times and he had forgiven her a few times before. He told me he loved her so much and wasn’t sure he could love like that ever again. I was okay with us starting slow, but I also really liked him.
The more we hung out, the more I liked him. I tried reminding myself that he was not ready to submit, but that didn’t stop me from falling in love with him. I would buy him gifts, book trips with him, cook for him and even introduce him to my friends as his girlfriend. My actions showed I was already deep in love, but he never stopped me. I even told him I had fallen in love with him and he said he had noticed, and he really liked me too. I really wanted him to love me, but I was okay with him just liking me for now. I understood his heart needed time to heal, but we also did everything like every other couple.
But recently he started cancelling our date nights. He kept saying he had to work but my gut feeling told me he was lying. At a point I tried giving him space, but I couldn’t hold myself. I asked him what was wrong, and he said he had been communicating with his ex and she seems sorry about what happened. He said he wanted to give them another try. I was devastated and so heartbroken. He might not have said we were exclusive, but I thought he was totally done with his ex. I told him to do what was right for him and I tried moving on from it. It has been barely two weeks since they reunited, and he is back again. He called me and sounded so pissed. He said his ex had deceived him and he was really done this time. He wants us back together, but this time exclusive. I definitely still love him, but I don’t want to make the same mistake twice. Should I tell him to go heal first then come back when he’s ready? But what if I can help him get over his ex completely?
-In Love
#DLATribe, would it be right to wait for him to heal first then get back with him?